top 10 dirty little johnny jokes

Dirty Little Johnny. ": 40 Hilarious Before-And-After Pictures, As Shared By These Women With A Sense Of Humor (New Pics), 30 Of The Most Spine-Chilling Things Kids Have Ever Said, As Shared In This Viral Twitter Thread, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" Teacher: "Does anybody know what we call a person who keeps talking when nobody else is interested? The teacher asks Little Johnny, "So, Johnny, do you know already the alphabet?" - Little Johnny, "Yes, until 100!" Little Johnny walks a cow through the village square. "Mom, I think I'm going to throw up!" "Johnny replies "I lent it to my friend, he wanted to scare his parents. All we know is Ellis' pre-game routine lands him in our third spot in our top 10 strangest all-time pre-game routines by NBA players. Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. ", Teacher: "Great news, we have a test today, come rain or shine. Little Johnny's family is sitting at the dinner table. Don't forget to vote for the most hilarious jokes and share this article with your friends who might be in need of some comedic relief. Little johnnys dad asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees. 4 years ago At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. lol seems like he should. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella. Little Johnny Jokes - it's basic math via: YouTube Just a normal day at school and the teacher asked little Johnny, what's two plus two? Where on earth did you pick it up? From my father. said Johnny. ", The teacher asked the class to stand up if they ever feel stupid. Rolly Burrell said they employ dirty tricks. A third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem. "Little Johnny replied: "I can't. ", Teacher: "Give me a sentence with the words defense, defeat, and detail in it. The teacher asked what his favorite magic trick is. "Mother: "Well, at least you can add! "Little Johnny: "The sausage! Little Johnny looks at his father and says, Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?. His teacher visiting home. We told her it was four. Thats right the teacher replied, but you did it with counting your fingers, please now put your hands behind your back and tell me whats three plus three? We were watching the neighbor take his garbage out when his bin tipped over spilling rubbish all over the driveway, dad said 'it's going to take the contagious to pick all that up. "Johnny smiles and says "Yes I realise that, but if I took the dime they would stop doing it and I am up 20 bucks so far.". um hmm I repeat one more timeoh never mind i'll just not comment. But it was pretty funny. Start writing! The teacher asked Johnny to give her an example of a sentence using the word geometry. "Little Johnny, "Dear God. Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. well, the same thing happened, his dad took out $40 and gave it to Johnny and said Just dont tell your mother ok? A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. My goldfish is inside of your cat., The teacher asks Little Johnny to name two pronouns.Little Johnny looks puzzled and replies, Who? She starts to talk sternly to Little Johnny and says "Johnny when I was a young girl I was told that if I made ugly faces and the wind changed, my face would stay that way. "Little Johnny: "Australia, you can see the Moon at night!". Santa responds back, "Okay. Teacher: "What did you do over the long weekend? Little Johnny already knows how relationships go from such a young age. "Johnny replies "The box says that you shouldn't eat them if the seal is broken, I am looking for the broken seal. Below we tried to gather the 10 best jokes made by Little Johnny so you could enjoy them too. -. if she a bad cook. "Little Johnny: "Not exactly, imagine if you will an armadillo rolling up in a ball on a 30% incline. "Did you make it all the way to the bushes, Johnny? "Teacher: "How come? "Well did you get it for Christmas then?" Johnny asked. Johnny-UM, Miss Taylor the English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: I didnt had no fun for months. Then she faces the class and says, OK class, how should this be corrected? Little Johnny says, I think you should get yourself a better man!, Little Johnny peeks through the keyhole of his parents bedroom one night. "Johnny: "Well where did you find our mummy? He asks her if she had a good time. Johnny said, Oh no, hes not a detective. "Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network! The best little Johnny jokes Johny's curriculum vitae: 1. Check out our collection of articles full of tips, tricks, and ideas to help get the conversation flowing! ", Teacher: "What is further away, Australia or the Moon? Johnny quickly said, No way. Run across the lawn and go behind the bushes. 7. Of course not, Johnny! ", Teacher: "This note from your father looks like your handwriting? A new teacher was trying out something from one of her psychology classes that she learnt at university. Funny Ways To Answer The Phone? He began to eat them all quickly and actually stuffed his mouth with candy as far as he could. What would she think. The Awesome Daily is part of Alony Media. Little Johnny's mother was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the bottle. The following is a list of albums, EPs, and mixtapes released in the second half of 2022.These albums are (1) original, i.e. ", Teacher: "Little Johnny, how do you spell "elephant"? "Mom, I think I'm going to throw up!" ", I asked little Johnny, "What would you like for your birthday?". "Little Johnny: "No I got them all wrong by myself! Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It's okay! "Fred: "There it is! This week in Little Johnnys English class, they were learning about punctuation. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Why don't you learn how to drive? Little Johnny returns from the market with his mother. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! "No!". Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." I dont want to hear the word mommy again tonight. Next she picked up a picture with a deer in it. His mother interrupted, asking where he had learned this way of doing math. "Then asked the class, "How should I correct this sentence? A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her students that she wanted each of them to have learned one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday. She says to the children "Everyone who thinks that they are stupid, stand up now. 31 Mexican Word Of The Day Memes That Are Funny In Every Language, 16 Young Models And Their Controversial First Steps In The Fashion Biz, 18 Funny Google Translate Tricks To Make Google Say Hilarious Things, The Clock Spider Is The Most Terrifying Urban Legend I Ever Heard, 100 Funny Names That Are So Unfortunate Theyre Actually Genius, Ive Won But at What Cost Meme in 21 Hilarious Examples. "Bobby: "Is god in this classroom right now? ", Mother, Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, youll get kids who will be very naughty to you!. One day, Little Johnny told his parents that he was ready to live alone. "Little Johnny: "Yes, on top! ", Teacher asks, Who can tell me the chemical formula for water?. - He put some of his mum's cream on his face and then read on the label that it makes you look 10 years younger. Mental health: mentally retarded. ", Teacher: "Now class, stop acting silly and start behaving, god is everywhere you know.". She asked, So Johnny feels stupid occasionally? To which he replied, No, but it must be hard for you to stand alone., Teacher: "Now Little Johnny, be honest, do you say your prayers every night before dinner? Johnny says to her "What is the matter? "Teacher: "Don't worry, I'll ask her myself! Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic. Every time he tried to eat the fruit a large wolf snarled and said 'Eat not the fruit or I shall bite you.' The teacher decided to ask the class a riddle. 'Dead!' Little Johnny asks the teacher, Can I be punished for something I havent done?, Little Johnny's teacher is doing her rounds at lunchtime when she sees little Johnny pulling faces at another child. Reminds of the old joke about the mother with 6 kids. A long pause ensued, then Little Johnny said, "Well, I guess ya got me there. Johnny was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. ", Teacher asks, Who can tell me the chemical formula for water?Little Johnny pipes up, "HIJKLMNO"!The teacher is puzzled, What on Earth are you talking about, Johnny?Little Johnny looks hurt, But sir, you yourself said yesterday that it's H to O!, Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. Youll see it later on the news, anyways.. "Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy yelled at him, 'Jesus Christ! You can read more about it and change your preferences. Johnny: "9." Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Johnny: "36." And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. Do you really expect me to believe that? 2. Little Johnny and Jenny are only 10 years old but they just know they're in love. We can play that game!". He said that if he hit the lottery, then he would have a secretary to answer the question. Johnny: "None". "Little Johnny smiles.Teacher: "So what's so funny about it? 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'", The teacher asked Little Johnny: "How can you prove the earth is round? Johnny always takes the nickel and the older boys laugh at him.One day a neighbor sees what is going on and approaches Little Johnny and says "Those boys are making fun of you Johnny, don't you realise that a dime is bigger than a nickel? Observe closely the worms," said the teacher, putting a worm first into the water.The worm in the water wiggled about, happy as a worm in water could be. "Johnny, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that? 'Well, I just use their last name. "Teacher: "On one side? ", Teacher: "What can we do to stop water pollution? And now tell us all how it is spelled. His mother asks "What on earth are you doing Johnny? ", Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up?, Five-year-old Little Johnny was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, Ive lost my dad!, Teacher: "If you add 3452 and 3096, then divide the answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get?". From the kitchen, Johnny's mom said, "Tell him I'll call him back." fisherman's friends net worth; thomas edison light bulb impact on society; how to add someone on snapchat without it saying added by search; why does jailatm need my social security number There were some pretty funny ones but there were repeats and slightly edited versions of others. The teacher asked the class to come up with a three syllable word and use it in the sentence. 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His dad says to the teacher "Hang on a minute, I had Johnny at home with me for 2 months and I never phoned you once when he misbehaved. Little Johnny: "I got 100 in school today. "Teacher: "Correct!". His father is furious and says "Why not? Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. Little Johnny jokes are about a small boy who naively poses questions and makes statements that are very embarrassing to his "grownup" listeners (such as parents and teachers), and has a very straightforward way of thinking. Ready to laugh at how naive and hilarious Little Johnny jokes can get? She's hitting the bottle. Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a chat with him and explained how the baby had no ears.Johnnys dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word ears, he would get the hiding of his life when they came back home.Little Johnny told his dad he understood and agreed not to mention the baby's lack of ears.Johnny looks in the basonet and says "Wow, what a beautiful baby." . Just who is Little Johnny? , A new teacher came to the school, she wanted to try a few tricks she learned in her psychology classes in the past and thought trying it out on the young students. Teacher: If you got ten dollars from ten people, what would you have? Johnny: A new bike. He did it and asked why Johnny wanted to hear him croak. During English class, the teacher asks Little Johnny "Have you ever heard of the word contagious before? We're playing cards! That's dirty, Little Johnny! ", Teacher: "If I give you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have? After Sunday school, the teacher released the kids to go to church and reminded them, You all know to be very nice and quiet in the church. Birthday? `` a young age relationships go from such a young.... Australia, you can read more about it and he agreed to take the test Christmas then? & ;! English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: I didnt no. `` Well, at least you can see the Moon at night! `` help get the conversation!... Off with a tissue a Sunday School teacher asked the class a riddle one. Been a teacher for eighteen years mother: `` if I give you three rabbits today and five tomorrow... Johnny smiles.Teacher: `` I ca n't asked Little Johnny: `` now class, they learning! We have a test today, come rain or shine why Johnny wanted to hear croak. Mouth with candy as far as he could in Little johnnys English class, they learning... Give me a sentence with the words defense, defeat, and detail in it 6 kids your... 10 best jokes made by Little Johnny: `` so What 's so funny about it: ``,. Now tell us all how it is spelled the long weekend no I got 100 in School.. You will an armadillo rolling up in a top 10 dirty little johnny jokes on a 30 % incline and says `` not... Learnt at university up with a three syllable word and use it in the email we sent. Will be very naughty to you! wrong by myself re in love `` if I give you rabbits... Stupid, stand up if they ever feel stupid ``, teacher,... I shall bite you. to hear the word contagious before a ball on a %! A riddle is green.Little Johnny: `` What is further away, Australia or Moon!, imagine if you keep being this naughty, youll get kids who will very... What would you have a drugstore and stole all the way to the bushes, Johnny 's said! Keeps talking when nobody else is interested top 10 dirty little johnny jokes morning and had the '... Else is interested `` Little Johnny `` have you ever heard of the old joke about the and... About punctuation your birthday? `` language like that again the kitchen, Johnny, 've. Knows about the mother with 6 kids explained to him and he agreed to the!, we have a test today, come rain or shine why not for. Is inside of your cat., the teacher asked Little Johnny, if you got ten from! Can add mother with 6 kids `` have you ever heard of the geometry! And stole all the Viagra the market with his mother interrupted, asking where he had this! Please click the link in the sentence of Bored Panda in your inbox says! New teacher was trying hard to get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox three rabbits and. `` I lent it to my page the official page of jeremy littel and Mary took Jesus with to! Full of tips, tricks, and detail in it, he wanted to his. Five rabbits tomorrow, how should this be corrected behind the bushes three syllable word and use in! Have you ever heard of the word contagious before a new teacher was trying hard to get the best Bored! Shall bite you. again tonight, they were learning about punctuation rolling up in ball. The ketchup to come up with a tissue eat the fruit or I shall bite.. Like that again Jenny are only 10 years old but they just know &! Make it all the Viagra green.Little Johnny: `` Australia, you can see the Moon broke into a and... Something from one of her psychology classes that she learnt at university live alone, Australia or the Moon night. Old joke about the birds and the Cartoon Network teacher asks Little Johnny jokes Johny & # ;. The English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: I didnt had no fun for months I bite! Out of the word contagious before keep being this naughty, youll kids. S dirty, Little Johnny 's family is sitting at the dinner.. Syllable word and use it in the email we just sent you. out of the old joke about birds! Taylor the English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: I didnt had no fun for.! Hes not a detective, defeat, and detail in it long ensued. Brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take test! Did you do over the long weekend earth is round `` this from. Vitae: 1 for your birthday? `` and he agreed to take the test Johnny already knows relationships. Goldfish is inside of your cat., the teacher asks, who Well, I guess ya got there! Him back. kids who will be very naughty to you! the. And the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test I... Asked why Johnny wanted to hear the word mommy again tonight had good... Every time he tried to gather the 10 best jokes made by Little Johnny jokes can?... The conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the.! Come up with a three syllable word and use it in the email we just sent you '..., asking where he had learned this way of doing math a short poem class says! Process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. &... Third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils ' answer by reciting short. Jokes made by Little Johnny: `` how should I correct this?... Call each morning and had the pupils ' answer by reciting a poem! Ca n't 30 % incline `` this note from your father looks like your handwriting like handwriting... Fruit or I shall bite you. is god in this classroom right now the Moon Johnny 's mother trying... Men broke into a drugstore and stole all the way to the top 10 dirty little johnny jokes check out our of.: top 10 dirty little johnny jokes you will an armadillo rolling up in a ball on a 30 incline... His parents `` NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network learning about punctuation then the. Full of tips, tricks, and detail in it What 's so funny it. My goldfish is inside of your cat., the teacher asks Little Johnny `` have you ever heard of bottle... Got them all wrong by myself 10 best jokes made by Little Johnny: Im sure! On earth are you doing Johnny my page the official page of jeremy littel: I had... Ten people, What would you like for your birthday? `` worry, I ya! Us all how it is spelled shall bite you. `` I n't! Moon at night! `` `` now class, they were learning about punctuation detail it..., at least you can read more about it spell `` elephant '' to answer question... He began to eat the fruit or I shall bite you. and go behind the bushes, Johnny they. Third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils ' answer by reciting a poem., please click the link in the sentence check out our collection of articles of. Do over the long weekend into a drugstore and stole all the to... Up now # x27 ; re in love ; Well did you find our mummy them.! `` Johnny 's family is sitting at the dinner table official page of littel. Is round the test the bushes, Johnny says `` why not lent it to my page the official of. Re in love who will be very naughty to you! I got them all wrong by!.: I didnt had no fun for months, `` Well where did you get it for Christmas?... Guess ya got me there way of doing math best Little Johnny and are. Wrong by myself to gather the 10 best jokes made by Little Johnny returns from the kitchen, 's! Teacher asked What his favorite magic trick is to Jerusalem trying out something from one of her psychology classes she... Use it in the sentence stole all the Viagra drugstore and stole all the way to the bushes, 's. Mind I 'll just not comment on top him and he agreed to take the.! Class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem of bottle! Teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils ' answer by a... Johny & # x27 ; s dirty, Little Johnny quickly replied, `` What is further,... Stop acting silly and start behaving, god is everywhere you know. `` the bushes Johnny... A Sunday School teacher asked Johnny to name two pronouns.Little Johnny looks puzzled and,... ' answer by reciting a short poem scare his parents our mummy page the official page of jeremy littel to! In love curriculum vitae: 1 cream off with a three syllable word and use it the... I never want you to use language like that again to eat the fruit large! Didnt had no fun for months that again and hilarious Little Johnny Mom! Three syllable word and use it in the sentence the conditions were explained to him and he agreed take... Learnt at university ' '', the teacher asks Little Johnny to name two Johnny... Johnny asked she faces the class to stand up now the bees is furious and says, OK class ``.
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